I Digress #9 - I'll take a big black Bee to go, please, and can you make that super-sized?

A few years back I was out shopping for several hours, which seriously (despite my being a girl) is my LEAST favorite thing to do! ewww, shopping!! I was exhausted and worn out and realized I was STARVING! I decided I was too tired to go home and make something for dinner, so I stopped at a place I frequented a LOT back then... Jack in the Box! mmmmmmm!! Their Tacos are disgustingly delicious!!


I pulled up to the drive thru Menu and even though I knew EXACTLY what I was going to order because I always got the same thing every single time, I still asked for a minute to look over the menu.. just in case I wanted to go out on a limb and order something DIFFERENT!!!!


I think the guy came on the speaker like 2 or 3 times to ask me if I was ready to order. I figured, eh.. there's no one behind me so I took my time. After 5 minutes of looking over the menu, I decided to get MY USUAL!! hahaha... I told the guy I was ready to order. He seemed relieved. Just when I went to talk... to my HORROR... A GIGANTIC BLACK BEE started buzzing around the menu and flew right up to my window!!!



Some of you already KNOW that I hate bugs, spiders, and INSECTS!!! ESPECIALLY the kinds that defy the laws of GRAVITY such as this huge black bee that was now staring me in the face!! - I IMMEDIATELY PANICKED and I screamed.. right into the speaker!!! The guy on the speaker, said.. "Ma'am? Are you alright?" I was frantically trying to roll up my window, but it was taking its sweet time rolling up!! I felt vulnerable! I was so frightened because the bee was so close that I could hear it buzzing and the sound seemed to be amplified by my present fear!!

He asked me again.. "Ma'am? Is everything all right?" The only response I could give the guy was a handful of unrecognizable syllables and some scattered squeaks and squeals. I could see him looking out his window up ahead but he was just far enough that the bee was not visible, so to HIM... it was as if I had just SNAPPED!! Lost it right there in the drive thru!! That poor guy, I'm sure he felt helpless as he watched me flailing inside my car. Meanwhile.. I had 4 more inches to go before my window was all the way up... I was still panicking... and still sputtering out unrecognizable sounds. I had goosebumps all over my body along with some shuttering! (I'm even cringing NOW as I recall this traumatic experience!) Just when I thought I'd get the window up in time, that dang buzzing black bee came and head butted my window near the top of the opening!! It was loud!! That of course created an involuntary scream into the microphone AGAIN! It landed on my window and it was crawling up towards the opening... It was like a race between IT and the mechanics of my car window!!

I heard the guys voice one more time in the fading distance as I literally peeled out and screamed all the way down the street, hoping that I hadn't trapped the bee INSIDE the car with me!!! My goosebumps were more like MOOSEbumps!!! The adrenaline was pumping furiously through my body. I kept patting my clothes and tussling my hair and itching my arms as my mind created sensations of that bee climbing all over me. It took me an HOUR to calm down.

I've never been back to that Jack in the Box because I've been too embarrassed to ever see that guy again! It's been a few years and I KNOW he doesn't work there any longer but STILL... *blush*

If yer gonna go Cupping.. you gotta do it RIGHT!

**See original post below**

I have LOVED reading the comments about Cupping!! I should've mentioned that if you plan on going Cupping... the only REAL way to go and have complete SUCCESS with the cup staying on your car is to use the magnets found in old hard drives that are ruined or crashed or useless. I LOVE FINDING OLD HARD DRIVES!!! hahaha... They are like gold to me!! Just for the magnets!! I knoooooow... *rolling eyes*

Okay, so here's a quick lesson on the hard drive. Pay no attention to anything that doesn't say MAGNETS!! Cause really.. let's be honest! That's the only important thing in a dead hard drive. :)



Here's what they actually look like once they are removed!


There are 2 in each hard drive and they are kinda hard to get out because they are super powerful magnets. You kind of have to PRY them off, and a lot of times they break.. which is fine. They will still work. :) They are so super duper powerful that you can do lots of fun things with them like see if you can separate your fingers when they are like this.. (see below)


HOWEVER: BE CAREFUL because when you get them even remotely close to each other, they attract with such force that they will PINCH you and give you blood blisters. Ouch! It hurts! So I recommend stacking them and leaving them stacked. It's nearly impossible to get them apart anyways, but it's fun trying. :)

SOO, if you think that regular magnets from Ace Hardware or Wal-Mart will do the trick.. I'm here to tell you they won't. Maybe going like 15 miles an hour, but that's no fun! Because if you get going very fast, the cup will knock over and lay side ways on your roof as you're driving down the street. And if you didn't get weird looks BEFORE.. you WILL NOW!! LOL!!! So REALLY, you need to bring in the BIG GUNS!! They Heavy artillery!! The Super-duper Hard Drive Mags!!
My Roommate and I tested these and we put the cup on the side of the car as displayed below. We were able to go 50 mph before we lost the straw and 85 mps before we were afraid the cops would catch us for speeding on the freeway.. so really, we don't know what speed these Magnets can endure!! :) We got some great looks though!! :)




I can't believe I just gave a lesson about hard drives... I don't know anything about them except for the golden nuggets of FUN that lay inside them....


:)

I Digress #8 - CUPPING!!

For those of you who haven’t HEARD of "Cupping".. I'm so excited to introduce you to it!! I’m sure you’re VERY curious as to what it is exactly! And for the many of you that I have taken Cupping… please post your memories! Your experience could really add to this post! :) hehee

One day about 10 years ago, my younger brother, Dean, picked me up from work in his "puddle-hopper" of a car and before we took off, he said with a mischievous grin, "Wanna have some FUN?" Of COURSE I was in!! He rolled down his window and dumped out the ice in his Jack n the Box cup. Then he threw in a few heavy duty magnets and put the lid and straw back on. He had my full attention. He then stuck the cup on top of the car and with all those magnets, it wasn't going ANYWHERE!! :) We embarked on what became the start of YEARS of FUN EXPERIENCES for me and my friends!!!! :) It was rush hour and he began to explain the rules to me as we pulled out on to the busy street.
Cupping Rules:
1. You must ACT as if you had no idea that you left your drink on top of the car.
2. Do not look at other drivers for their reactions, unless you can do so inconspicuously. Sun Glasses work the best.
3. Even though every fiber of your being wants to laugh uncontrollably, it is strictly forbidden, except for in casual conversation in the car.
4. You must listen to your music loudly, as to cover up the yelling of random people trying to get your attention.
5. When confronted about leaving your drink on top of the car, you must be gracious to the kind hearted soul who thinks they just saved your car from pop spilling all over it.
6. When you have to take the cup off your car, act embarrassed and thank them. Then turn off onto a street and put the cup out again. Wait for 1 to 2 minutes before returning to the FUN!

Okay, so those are the rules of CUPPING!! :) Now for some of the funniest experiences I've had while doing it. :) So many have come to my mind as I've been writing, but I've had way too many to share. hehehe

When my brother, Dean, and I were driving home, it was rush hour so all the cars were inching forward together. We hadn't been on the street for more than 30 seconds before we had our first bite. Dean reminded me to pretend not to notice the lady next to us waving her arm at us out her window. He said give it a moment or two. IT WAS SO HARD NOT TO BURST INTO LAUGHTER!! The lady was PERSISTENT and started honking her horn, which not only got OUR attention, but the attention of everyone else around us! I looked around and could see people pointing and smiling. I looked over at the lady and she was doing the "roll your window down" motion. As I rolled it down, Dean said under his breath, "get ready for the fun!". I acted confused as I looked at the lady. She seemed relieved!! She said, "Oh my goodness, I thought I was NEVER going to get your attention! You left your drink on top of your car and I was so afraid it would spill and your car would be all sticky!" I could hardly contain my laughter.. I smiled and looked at Dean... he reached up and pulled the cup off. We thanked the lady and acted embarrassed. She kept going on and on about how worried she was and how hard she tried to get our attention. Have you ever held a long conversation out the window during rush hour? Yeah, it was hilarious!!

We didn’t get too many other opportunities to do put the cup out since we were basically with the same bunch almost the entire way home. But I was SO EXCITED to share this new discovery with my friends!!!

I used to like to go cupping down Mill Ave because that was near ASU and it was an entire STREET filled with concerned people who would flag us down, or people who would laugh and point at the morons who left their cup on the car. Once while stopped at a stop light near Mill Ave, a bicycle cop rode up next to us, knocked on my window and as I rolled it down he said, you may want this. He had a hard time getting it off, but he just handed it to me and rode off. We almost DIED laughing! Another guy ran over to us as well and said.. “Just thought you’d like to know there’s a cup on your car.” Mill Ave is so crowded with College kids, that it’s impossible to go more than 5 mph down that stretch, so, eventually as people started remembering us, we chose a new location to go Cupping. Haha

It’s soooo fun to take a group of friends and drive around and listen to all the horns honking and all the arms flapping out their car windows and people shouting their concerns. I wish that you ALL knew just how funny it is.

There are way too many experiences to share, so I will share only some highlights. Like the time we were stopped at a red light and a couple of pedestrians were yelling to us and pantomiming a cup onto on our car! Haha Or when the Cop car pulled up right beside us at a red light and said that we had a cup on the car and when I pulled it off the roof, the magnets were so strong that I couldn’t get it off and the cop just stared. I finally yanked it off and by the time I had it in my lap, it was crumpled up and destroyed! (what was he thinking!!) I also loved the time when my friends and I were jamming out to our music at a red light and these guys next to us were trying to tell us about the cup. We pretended not to hear or understand them, just then, one of the guys jumped out and ran over to hand it to us before the light turned green. I panicked.. He tried to lift it and when he got it off he looked inside and noticed that the whole thing was a joke.. he laughed so hard and said we were cool. Haha Him and his buddy said they wanted to join us.. that’s when we took off. LOL. I remember driving around a busy mall one night after dinner with friends. A security guard pulled us over and was happy to report that he saved our car from getting sticky. 10 minutes later, he caught us doing it again on the other side of the parking lot. We were embarrassed because we knew he knew. Haha

Many many many more memories out there. The greatest part about CUPPING is that the people who are concerned enough to flag us down, honk their horns, flap their arms, yell, point and gesture all go home and tell their family or roommates that they saved someone’s car from a big sticky mess!! It makes them feel WONDERFUL inside and it provides HOURS of entertainment to me and whomever I have along on the journey.

LONG LIVE CUPPING!!!!!!!!!

I digress #7 - Cops and white lies!

I've always been so afraid of Cops. I don't really know why. They are supposed to be the "Good Guys", but they run around acting like they're THE LAW!! They ARE the Law, but they don't have to act so tough and better than!! They've always intimidated me. I know there are many nice cops out there too, however. I've gotten pulled over 5 times in my life.. Once when I was 16, I had just got my license and I pulled out in front of a cop, when I saw that it WAS a cop I slowed down even though I hadn't even hit the speed limit yet! There go the flashing lights and the sinking feeling that comes with it! He asked me if I knew why he'd pulled me over.. I said "Well my speedometer is broken, was I speeding?" Uhm. Lesson one. Act dumb and say "No officer, did I do something wrong?" and then batt your eyes and smile. :) Lesson two.. Never tell a cop that your speedometer is broken! He pulled me over to say that if he had've been a drunk person or a distracted person, then he would've plowed right in to me. I think he was quite OVER-EXAGGERATING, I mean.. come on.. PLOWED?? Oh well, he gave me a warning... so I'll let him over-exaggerate all he wants! :) He made me promise to get my speedometer fixed that same week.. but I don't recall that ever happening. :)

It's not so bad any more, but there was a time in my life when I was so paranoid about Cops that if one ever pulled behind me I'd freak out, check my speed a dozen times in a 5 second time-frame and then take my first right just to get out of their radar regardless of if it made me late to where I was going! Even if I wasn't doing anything wrong! It was ridiculous! However, most of the time, I DO have to worry when I see Cops, because I have a NEED FOR SPEED! :) It's true. I have a led foot. I'm not proud of it, but it leads me to this blog entry which I believe you'll enjoy. :)

So, way back in 1996 or 97, I was friends with this awesome girl named Amie. Yep, I'm still good friends with her. :) She had her own car. A 1985 Mazda 323 Hatchback. I was stuck sharing ole bessie with the family so to ME, it was cool that she owned her own car. She said that she was going out of town for a week and that I could borrow her car ON ONE CONDITION!!!! That I didn't speed in it!! Wow.. a car all to myself for an entire week?? To come and go as I pleased without consulting the family for car needs? What a fantastic DEAL!! Oh wait... did she say no speeding??? Whoa... was it possible? I told her YES, it was a DEAL!! And right then and there I made a promise to myself that I would never speed in her car. She left out of town and I had her car! How exciting! I was doing soooo good! I was impressing even myself that I drove only the speed limit!! Not even the 5 above which we're allowed to go! Even though it drove me insane.. I had made that promise and I was keeping it! Amazing! :)

I made it through every single day FLAWLESSLY!! I couldn't WAIT until Amie got back in town and I could report that I never sped once in her car. :) The night before she arrived back home, I was going on my last little jaunt in her car. I was late for a wedding reception for a good friend.. nevertheless I didn't speed to get there. I didn't know where the chapel was and it was 8:45pm so I could not afford to make any wrong turns! But of course I DID! I made a legal U-Turn and to make up for lost time.. I decided to speed back to the light because I just COULDN'T miss the reception!! As I waited at the red light to turn left, the DEVIL in a COP CAR pulled up behind me!!! I swear he had horns!! The sinking feeling overwhelmed me and I started squirming in my seat and was saying NO NO NO NO NO!!! I'VE BEEN SO PERFECT ALL WEEK!!!!! PLEASE NO!!!! PLEEEEEASE NO!!!!!

The light turns green, I turn left and he's right on my tail. I'm scared out of my wits at this time, so I decide I'm going to LOSE this fella, so I take my first left into a neighborhood!! SO DID HE!! He's STILL right behind me! I freak out, so I take my first RIGHT going even DEEPER into a neighborhood!! All the while I'm still saying NO NO NO!!! It's NOT RIGHT! I've done everything PERFECT!!! PLEASE NO NO NO!!!! After I turn right.. he follows me!! Since my little diversion didn't work, I came up with PLAN B!! (Please note... I do not recommend Plan B to ANYONE!!)

I pull over to a house and park. He pulls over across from me. I PRETEND I DON'T NOTICE HIM.... and I get out of the car and ignore his very existence. I walk up to this house and as I'm walking up, I notice that I just HAPPENED to pick the ONLY DARK HOUSE ON THE STREET!! But I can't turn back now.. the cop is watching me. (I wonder what he was thinking..) I continue down the seemingly endless walkway up to the dark house and I knock on the door. (so dumb.. where did my brain come up with that kind of PLAN B anyways!!!) I don't think well under pressure. :) Lesson three - NEVER EVER PRETEND that you "don't see" a Cop after he's followed you onto 4 streets!!!!

I could feel the cops penetrating gaze from behind me as I waited at the door of some unsuspecting homeowner. After I knocked, a little dog started yapping and soon all of the lights came on. If I wasn't panicking before.. I was NOW!! An older woman came to the door and as soon as she opened it, the cop pulled away. **WHEWH** My Plan B WORKED!!! YES!!! Oh CRUD.. there's a lady staring at me with wondering eyes. What the honk am I gonna tell her??? She said, "Yes? Can I help you?" She smelled of cigarettes and I had a hard time breathing at first. I am embarrassed to admit, but I told her a white lie. I figured I HAD to because I couldn't tell her that I had just eluded a COP.. she'd probably get the wrong idea and think I was a fugitive or something!!!

I simply smiled and said casually, "Hi. I'm here to pick up Amie." She said, "Oh I'm sorry dear, there's no Amie that lives here." Just to ham it up, I looked confused and said.. "Hmm, I must have the wrong address. I'm sorry to bother you, have a good night." YES!!! HOME FREE!!! I have 5 minutes to make it to the reception even though I never found the chapel yet!! However, Plan B backfired and my simple white lie turned into the white lie saga!!! She said, "Well, what is her last name? They might be my neighbors and I could point the house out to you." I think the color may have drained out of my face. I made up some random last name and of COURSE she didn't know them. She eagerly wanted to help me find Amie, bless her soul!! I just wanted to call it a night and LEAVE!! I felt captive to her and with every question she asked me, another LIE rolled off my lips... I felt awful, horrible and extremely guilty for lying to this sweet old lady. She asked me if I had the address, and I told her I had left them at home accidentally and was going from memory which is probably the reason I had knocked on the wrong door!! And then.. I changed my entire story!! Lesson Four - When lying to someone's face, never EVER change your story!!

I was getting antsy with this awkward situation and I needed to LEAVE! So I said, "Actually, I'm looking for a church." She said, "Oh." Looking very puzzled because I had just switched up everything. I'm a horrible liar. She continued, "The Mormon church?" Guilt and Shame must have been written all over me.. I nodded my head and she slowly raised her arm up and pointed directly behind me saying, "Do you mean.... That Mormon Church?" Just then, my life turned into a slow-motion movie as I turned around to see the steeple standing tall and proud lit up like a beacon in the night just on the other side of her neighbors house!! (duh, how could I have missed that!!!) I felt like the dust of the earth... I wanted to explain the whole story of what had just happened just so she'd know WHY I came to her house and lied to her like that!! I didn't though. It was 9:00. I got in the car and drove around the corner to the reception just in time to see my friend hop in her car and drive away with her new husband. She saw me and gave me a big smile and a wave as she drove past me. I was glad she at least knew I was there. But it didn't matter that much to me anymore.. I felt like I had a lot of repenting to do when I got home!

I'll never forget the infamous night of eluding the law and interrupting a nice old woman's evening with my lies!! For the next MONTH I drove past her house from time to time trying to get up the courage to bring her some homemade cookies and tell her my story and apologize to her. But I didn't. I learned many lessons that night!! The HARD WAY! LOL!! NOW I can look back and laugh when I tell the story!! I told it recently to a friend who said it coulda been worse if there HAD'VE been an Amie living there since it's such common name..!! OY!!

Moral of the story. Never elude the law and then pretend not to see them.. And never walk up to a dark house and start a conversation of LIES with an old lady!!!!!!!! Or better yet.. NEVER SPEED which is how this whole thing started in the first place! Even though I only sped for 3 seconds. *sigh*

Thanks Amie for letting me borrow your car for a week in 1997. :) It made for a fun blog today! :) I don't know why I freaked out... the cop didn't know I was in the car, he thought it was YOU! :) hahahaha! Love ya! :)